The lesson TikTok didn’t mean to teach us
The conversation about care is overdue for a shift.
TikTok was gone for 12 hours and we didn’t know if or when it was coming back.
That’s the thing about these platforms.
They’re borrowed land, not something we own.
And the grief documented was some of the most honest posting I’ve seen since the lockdown.
Here’s what TikTok ban taught us: connection is powerful.
Moms leaned on it for laughs, relatability, and those “it’s not just me” moments. It felt like community, even if it was virtual.
Now, I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with scrolling or having your digital crew. But this moment made me think: What if we focused less on self-care and more on community care?
Why Community Care Matters More
We’ve been sold the idea that self-care—spa days, bubble baths, alone time—will solve everything. And while a good coffee break is nice, what we really need is people.
People who’ll drop off a meal when you’re sick without you asking.
People who’ll pick up your kid when you’re running late.
People who’ll sit with you and say, “I’ve been there, too.”
That’s what TikTok mimicked so well: it felt like someone was always there, cheering you on or laughing with you. But here’s the thing—if that was your only source of connection, then this shutdown feels like a real loss.
Let’s Diversify Our Communities
We diversify our investments, so why not our support systems?
Have a virtual community for quick encouragement, laughs, and shared ideas.
Build an in-real-life (IRL) community for deeper care and those moments when you need someone to show up physically.
It’s the balance between a text thread that lifts you up and a neighbor who can drop by in a pinch. Both matter, but the IRL connections are where true community care lives.
Your Challenge: Create a Care Portfolio
Here’s how we move forward:
Add care to your calendar. This week, check in on a friend, offer to pick up groceries for someone, or send a “thinking of you” message. Community care starts with small, intentional actions.
Ask for what you need. If you’re running on empty, let someone help you. Vulnerability isn’t weakness—it’s the first step to building real connection.
TikTok did come back, but it’s a reminder that apps aren’t enough. True care happens when we show up for each other—online and offline.
So, what’s one way you’ll build community this week? Comment below. I’d love to hear your thoughts!
Until next time, keep showing up for what matters most.