Who Says You Have to Host It All?

The art of delegating with grace

My Pinterest and IG feeds are filled with recipe suggestions, place card printables and beautiful table settings all in preparation for Thanksgiving. I used to get so stressed out about this holiday in particular because it seemed like the key to having a successful family gathering was all about being the hostess with the most-ess (aka pressure to be perfect in your perfect home while looking perfect).

We’re told that we can pull it off if we download this printable schedule and start planning out three months in advance with that calendar but how about we do something a little more interesting? Let’s challenge the idea that we need to do it all in the first place. I hope that by the end of this post, you are more convinced that the art of delegation can be your secret weapon for a stress-free and enjoyable Thanksgiving. Let’s explore this world a bit more and learn how to navigate delegation with strategy and grace.

Embrace the Essentialist Mindset

Essentialism is the idea of doing less but better which means more energy for the vital few things that matter and less energy of the trivial many that usually occupy our time. In order to have an open mind about the concept of delegation, you have to acknowledge two things:

1. Your limitations - Yes. You are a superhero but even Wonder Woman had the Justice League. Asking for help and sharing the load not only build stronger teams, they allow each member to take pride in and enjoy the festivities.

2. Your priorities - Instead of using social media to help you create a task list, you need to identify what key elements actually matter to you and your family. Whether it’s spending quality time outside in nature or keeping the legacy of great-grandma Joan’s sweet potato pie going, be clear about what will make the day truly special.

The Art of Delegating

We’re not going to get into the nitty gritty of delegation here. If you want my exact method on how to delegate, then watch this youtube video called 3 Steps to Get you Delegating Effectively TODAY at Work and Home. I do want to give you some high level tips that will take your delegation game to the next level.

1. Recognize the strengths in your network - if you have a family member who is a Top Chef or a friend who can give Joanna Gaines a run for her money then assigning tasks based on expertise is the best way to increase the probability of success.

2. Communicate clearly and honestly - don’t just ask someone to decorate the table and then hope for the best. Be honest about your expectations, maybe even pick a color scheme together and then provide the necessary details like guest count and menu so they can have the right context and feel invested in the full vision.

3. Set realistic expectations - leave perfection at the door. When delegating an activity, don’t set a higher bar for them than you would for yourself and also give them permission to perform in a manner different to your own. It might even turn our better than yours and while that may sting a bit, remember the goal is for a more relaxed and enjoyable experience for all (including you).

Graceful Delegation in Action

If you’re all aboard the delegation train but need some ideas this Thanksgiving, then here are 7 ways to ease the burden and make the it the more enjoyable for everyone involved:

1. Create a detailed shopping list and assign the task of shopping to a specific person.

2. Choose a potluck-style meal where specific dishes or components are assigned to different people.

3. Collect small monetary contributions from attendees and get big ticket items like turkey and sweet potato casserole catered.

4. Assign the task of decorating and setting the table to someone who has an eye for aesthetics.

5. Identify a game master who will decide on what activities are played and who hosts that portion.

6. Ask someone in your family who has a musical ear to create a playlist to set the right mood.

7. Enlist specific family and friends to form a clean-up crew so the task doesn’t fall on the same person every year.

Bask in the Success

As the day unfolds, take a moment to appreciate the collective success. I can guarantee the day won’t be perfect, but it just might be more meaningful and fun. Once it’s all over, reflect on what went well and what could have gone better so you can continually refine your approach to delegating. Remember, it’s not only about creating moments of love, laughter and joy; it’s about participating in them as well. So, release the pressure, share some of the load and savor the goodness of the holiday season.

Wishing you and yours a beautiful Thanksgiving where the weight of world is not felt because it is shared with the people you love.

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Journal Prompts

1. What are the top 3 priorities for me during Thanksgiving?

2. What tasks or responsibilities do I find most challenging this time of year?

3. Who are three people I can ask for help or support in sharing the load?

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Nourishing Notes

• 300 copies of the Wellthy Mama guided self-love journal have been shipped out to me. Follow me on IG for the launch countdown or get on the VIP list for an opportunity to buy one day before everyone else.

• Conversations like this one around on-site childcare are happening which could help to keep mothers in the workplace.

• MPR News host, Angela Davis will be discussing how to make the best use of our time at work and at home with a time strategist on November 13th.

• If you are traveling during Thanksgiving, just know you’re not the only one. November 26th is the busiest day of the winter holiday to fly so pack extra patience on your way to your loved ones.